the dichotomy

the end of the school year has always been bittersweet for me.  from the time i was in preschool, i wrestled with my emotions on the last day -- excited for the upcoming summer with beach vacations and pool trips and camps, but sad to hug my teachers goodbye.  the dichotomy persisted during my teaching career; i couldn't wait for the opportunity to sleep past 5:30 a.m. and read novels instead of educational periodicals, but at the same time i dreaded saying goodbye to my eighth graders as they left our middle school for the last time.  and now, as a parent, it hits me again. 

today i felt the inevitable twinge of nostalgia wash over me, as i always do when the kids reach milestones, whether it's their first lost tooth or their first haircut or their last diaper or preschool graduation.  it hits me how their lives are moving at warp speed ... i swear just five minutes ago, liam was gripping my hand tightly as we navigated the wide halls of his new elementary school, wide-eyed as he looked up to the fifth graders passing by him.  and now, nine months later, he's bounding off the bus as a confident, savvy, far-more-independent rising first grader.

among the 1,500 work samples and book reports and pieces of art that came home crammed into his backpack was a project of what he'd like to be when he grows up.  and in the words that he wrote is yet another dichotomy: a stellar athlete who, at the same time, loves all things academic.  a boy who heads outside the first chance he gets to kick the soccer ball and shoot hoops and play tennis in the cul-de-sac, who will also sit in the back seat of the car and multiply fractions and divide decimals and add negative integers in his head for fun.  

i look forward to seeing just who he becomes, whether it's a baseball player or an accountant or something in between.  and yet, at the same time, i want to keep him just like this forever.  i guess the push and pull, the joy and the sorrow, the triumphs and the challenges -- that dichotomy is what makes parenting the wild ride that it is. 

Liam Mann, Future Baseball Player and Accountant

My future's so bright, I've gotta wear shades!

First I want to play baseball for the Los Angeles Dodgers.  I want to play CF (Center Field).  I want my jersey number to be 34.  After that, I want to be a number accountant.  I want to make a Roman numeral for zero!  The End!