we've just returned from a most amazing trip up to DC, i'm happy to report. had you asked me four days ago , i might have predicted otherwise. you know you might have yourself a bit of a problem when your spouse is remarking to a neighbor that our adventure was looking a lot like the "griswold family vacation" BEFORE YOU EVEN HAVE PULLED OUT OF THE DRIVEWAY.
so let me just describe how it all went down. wednesday night i stood up from my computer chair -- my expensive ergonomic computer chair, mind you -- and immediately froze. in pain. stabbing pain that i've experienced before that will often take me out of commission for days. chris was already asleep so i hobbled up the stairs as best i could, attempted to brush my teeth for two minutes like my electric toothbrush wants me to (but couldn't stand for that long), took a painkiller that my orthopedist prescribed the last time i threw out my back, and crept gingerly into bed. i fell into a drug-induced slumber, trying hard to convince myself that i was going to miraculously awake to a new spine and be able to chaperone susanna's kindergarten field trip to the farm like i had promised that i would.
alas, it was not to be. chris's amazing mother pinch-hit for me (that is the correct sports term, right?) and i remained in bed on an ice pack for most of thursday. and all the while, i'm wondering how in the world i'm going to sit in a car for 5+ hours the next morning on our long-planned spring break family trip.
i determined that the only way i could possibly make it was lying in the back of our SUV on an ice pack, surrounded by pillows. which meant that chris's plan of taking his much more fuel-efficient sedan was no longer an option. he smiled a tight smile at me, very likely grumbled under his breath as he returned to the driveway to rearrange what he had already done, and that was that.
until i hobbled out to the driveway on friday morning and realized that i had neglected to explain my need for the SUV. i figured he would have somehow understood my plan to lie in the back on an ice pack. he, on the other hand, had assumed i wanted the captains chair and the legroom, and had instead stuffed the back of the SUV with all of our luggage.
so once more, he had to undo all that he had done. while this is all taking place, the lights were on, the music was playing, the GPS was running, and the battery was depleting. which we realized, as soon as we were all in place, ready to go ... and the car wouldn't start.
so he grabbed his jumper cables and assured the kids that we'd be going in no time -- until he realized that the cables were just not quite long enough to reach his car. and remember, i was of absolutely no help at this point, as i was lying on my back on an ice pack. (not that i really would've been much help under normal circumstances, but i could have at least gone around the cul-de-sac to hunt down longer cables. or offered moral support. or something.)
at this point, i suggested to the kids that they get out of the car and move around a little bit, and asked them to open the back door for me to maybe roll out (or at least get some fresh air.) and it was then that we realized that i was actually locked in. the only way to open the back door is with the power buttons, which were, of course, all non-functional because we had no battery. and i couldn't clamber over the back row to exit through the side doors because i was lying on my back on an ice pack.
by now, we were being inundated with questions from the kids. most notably, "are we ever going to get to the american girl place by 12:30 for our lunch reservations?" (which had already crossed my mind.) chris was pounding the steering wheel in frustration, and i was lying on my back on an ice pack laughing at the absurdity of it all.
we wound up borrowing some longer cables from a neighbor, successfully jump-started our car, and got off without a hitch. until we ran into an hour-long delay on I-95 because of road construction, but that's not nearly as interesting. i was able to call the american girl place as i lay on my back on an ice pack and pushed back susanna's and my lunch reservation by 90 minutes, and even then, we barely made it.
but we did make it. we survived, i'm actually somewhat mobile by now, and all's well that ends well. but for a little while there on friday morning, it was looking a little dicey.
pictures to come -- none of which, thankfully, were taken from the back of the SUV while lying on an ice pack.
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