signs of the times

i recently saw an ad for A&E's critically acclaimed documentary "obsessed", which shows adults with fairly serious OCD issues washing their hands repeatedly, flicking on and off lights, or twirling their hair.   it occurred to me that the viewing public is fascinated with the whole concept because, let's face it, we all have OCD tendencies.  i mean, our billion-dollar toy industry would have ceased to exist decades ago if it weren't for the fact that every american child develops an obsession about one thing or the other.  can you imagine what life would be like if they didn't?  "oh, santa, i don't need another matchbox car.  i already have one!"  or, "you gave me a princess doll last year.  why in the world would i want any more?"  etc.

so of course, liam is like all of his friends -- he gets stuck on something and won't let it go.  unlike his friends, however, he's not buying silly bands or trading pokemon cards or asking for more legos.  but he sure is running us out of house and home in the paper department.

because liam is obsessed with creating EXIT SIGNS.

what is an Exit Sign, you ask?  here is a list of simple steps so you can make your own!

step 1: find a piece of paper.  it could be a shopping list, or the back of a receipt, or a piece of junk mail, or it might even be a brand new sheet from a notepad if you're feeling generous.

step 2:  fold the paper hot dog bun style.  (this is the term i'd use when teaching symmetry in middle school math -- as opposed to hamburger bun style -- if that visual image makes any sense.)  give it a good crease so it will stand tent-like on its own.

step 3:  with a marker or crayon, write the word EXIT, the # of the exit, whatever the destination may be, and then an arrow pointing off to the side -- just like you'd see on a highway.

now that you know exactly what i'm talking about, you might wonder how this all started .  it's been going on for so long (i'm talking months and months) that i can't quite remember.  i think that he was growing tired of the plastic street signs that came with his parking garage and wondered if we could make something new and different to guide his cars as they exited the lot.  and i must have suggested creating an Exit Sign.  that first week or so of this obsession, we must have made dozens.  he'd tell anyone who'd listen all about his Exit Signs, which was always met with a quizzical look and an, "oh my, doesn't that sound interesting?!" (which is what all nice adults say when they don't understand what in the ham sandwich this child is talking about.)  he'd climb into the car after preschool with three or four ideas for new Exit Signs, chomping at the bit to get started as soon as we walked in the door home. 

so we now have Exit Signs for just about every place we frequent on a regular basis: church, the beach house, the grocery, the library, the toy store, the dry cleaner, the bank.  and then some really suspect places ... like the courthouse, and, um, jail.  (i admit that i let my tags expire and had to show up in court to have my fees waived ... but i swear to you we've never been to the raleigh jail.  no idea where that idea came from.)  we've just about exhausted every meaningful destination, to the point that if i just happen to mention something in passing that we do not yet have an Exit Sign for, he's all over it like hot butter until we've created such a Sign. 

while i initially wanted to just snap a picture to document this funny obsession, looking at all of these Signs together in close proximity was actually quite enlightening -- it's like a visual progression of his fine motor skill development.  when this all started, liam would come to me with a new idea for a Sign, and i'd do all the work while he hovered.  but little by little, he's taken over every step.  he now folds the paper.  he now chooses the location and figures out how to spell it.  he now painstakingly writes in thick capital letters and draws the arrow.  and then he proudly shows it off to anyone who's around, before he finds its rightful spot on the floor somewhere and he starts the whole process over again.   

one important note: these signs are accurate.  he can now get on mapquest, type in the destination, and pull up a list of directions that will include the exit number he needs.  obviously, this is not always the case -- in the picture above, you might be able to make out the one  that says "exit 100B, MY BED" -- but by and large, if it's a real live place, it's correct.

so if you ever find yourself on a highway, lost with no GPS and no map, fear not.  give liam a call.  he'll hook you up -- and then, to be sure, he'll be hunched over the kitchen table, tongue protruding from his little mouth in concentration, as he creates yet another Exit Sign.