buying in bulk

i love bargains. sad as it is to admit, the coupon section of the sunday paper is one of the highlights of my weekends. our family dinner menu plan is based on the advertised specials in the wednesday grocery circulars. and after almost a decade of marriage, my inner cheapskate self has even managed to convert my husband. he's always proud to show me his receipt after stopping by the store on the way home from work to pick up a few items, pointing out how much he saved with his frequent customer card. and let's face it, in this economy, it's foolish NOT to do all of the above. one of my favorite ways to save money is by belonging to a warehouse club. it's amazing how cheap certain things can get when you buy in large quantity. susanna and i made a trip there this week, searching for deals and ways to save. unfortunately, after we returned to the house with our wares, two glaring problems reared their ugly heads, both of the paper products variety. Paper Product Problem #1: in my euphoria that always comes from simply pushing that big red monster shopping cart, i forgot that we have downsized significantly from our last house. gone are the dozens of deep cabinets with tons of extra space. gone is the walk-in pantry with a few empty shelves. gone is the easily-accessible storage room. gone is our basement. of course, this all came flooding back to me as i shimmied through our front door, lugging about 52 rolls of paper towels. i stopped in the middle of the kitchen, searching for anywhere to store these gems, somehow expecting a magical solution to appear. nope. we now have at least one paper towel roll stuffed into every single nook and cranny of this house. there's even one crammed next to the DVR in our entertainment center. i suppose that the bright side is that no matter what kind of mishap or spill might occur, a paper towel is always within arm's reach -- a comforting thought with two preschoolers and new carpet. Paper Products Problem #2: imagine my elation to find that not only was toilet paper on sale, off of the already-low warehouse club price, BUT i had a coupon to boot! three-way savings! i was almost getting a high off this incredible deal ... until i got home with my 514 rolls (slight exaggeration) and put one of them on the dispenser in the bathroom. ugh. i have never seen such crappy -- excuse the language and the bad pun -- TP in all my life. it's thin and rough and one-ply and i swear it's worse than what you find in nasty gas station restrooms. i wiped liam's nose with some and he complained that it was hurting his face. of course, since i bought in bulk, we will quite literally be using this toilet paper for at least a year to come. with both of these Paper Products Problems, you'd think that i've learned my lesson. but as soon as we open that last paper towel roll, you can bet your bottom dollar i'll be back at the club, snatching up another load. and as uncomfortable and awful as it is, ain't no way i'm tossing out our toilet paper. i mean, come on. they are both such a great deal.